July 14, 2010

Who's The Mack?

I'm sitting here listening to Ice Cube - you know, like every Wednesday evening - and my head is just absolutely buzzing about The Association. I don't think people understand what has occurred in recent months, both at home and abroad, and I think it's time for O'Shay Jackson to take us through it like only he can...

"You wanna leave, but Sonny start talkin fast / And it make you want to go and sell more ass"

To KAHN! Wow, he must be talkin' slick, because I still believe.

Let's just say this: at least half of the current GMs are incompetent children who could fuck up a cup of Twinnings. They put together their teams based on the philosophy of "YOU WANNA RIDE BIKES?!?!!?!" They get lucky (see: Milwaukee) or they stay perpetually unlucky (see: Clippers) which is what they deserve. We used to have utter incompetence as our GM. Just walking death. And now we've got someone who is thinking. He at least is acquiring assets. Now, these assets may amount to nothing. And this whole thing could crumble. But you know what we have until it does? HOPE. And Deadzo never ever ever gave us hope. As soon as he had an asset... oh, like say, A FIRST ROUND DRAFT PICK, HE TRADED IT FOR MARKO JARIC, SWEET JESUS CHRIST IT STILL HURTS MY HEART. Deadzo never held onto any asset... he always had to trade it for a "ballplayer". Kahn at least has goals, and works to achieve them. If he's just talkin slick, well, that make me wanna go and sell more ass.


"You give him a dollar or a quarter and he's on his way / Then you see his sorry ass the next day"

David Stern. I never thought it would happen in my lifetime, and let me just say upfront that it hasn't happened YET, but I think we're starting to be able to have a conversation about a passing of the torch. The torch, of course, is The Commissioner Of A Professional Sports League Who Can Barely Speak For All The Owners' Ding-a-Lings In His Mouth. This, of course, has been held by Bud Selig since 1994. But now, oh boy.

David Stern lies every single day of his life. Nearly every press conference or statement, he lies. He lies about the financial situation of the league, to appease the owners. He lies about the referees and how fucked they are. He lies about "vision" of the NBA. (Pssst, here's a hint: the NBA has no vision whatsoever other than Git That Money Now And Fuck Everything) He lies about transactions and what he "would like to see". He lies when he gives out fines to Phil Jackson for saying the refereeing was "uneven". He lies to colleges when he repeatedly changes his mind (which is just the owners changing THEIR minds) about the entry age. He lies to the consumer every single time he opens his mouth by telling us that EVERYTHING IS JUST PEACHY FOLKS!

Gary Bettman could walk into a Starbucks and walk out without coffee. Tagliabue and now Goodell run their shit like this is Kiev. Bud Selig is such an obvious whore that it's not even worth a joke anymore. But Stern. He's a lawyer, so he THINKS he's putting all this over on everyone. But how long has it been since we've seen through the cracks? 4 years? 5? THEY HAD A REFEREE IN CAHOOTS WITH THE FUCKING MOB AND STERN SAID LIKE 4 SENTENCES THE ENTIRE TIME. It's such a joke.

So now we come to this Miami Go Party, and of course, Stern watches and doesn't know what to think. Why? The owners haven't told him what to think. He fired off some bullshit about how it wasn't "handled" properly, but yet nothing about collusion. Nothing about LeBron and the fact that he decided to do this two years ago. Nothing about Pat Riley, who must have photos of Stern, who gave the Wolves Michael Beasley, a #2 draft pick, for Jack and Shit. Free agency is one thing. But this amount of back-room dealing and collusion from both players and teams... it's just staggering. Are there even rules about this shit anymore? There used to be. The Wolves got their ass handed back to them with a receipt for under-thundering Joe Smith. We lost 5 draft picks. Miami? Well, just look at Riley's hair. Not any less greasy...........


"No I didn't kill or steal or rob / Locked up for what? Cause I'm rollin with the Lench Mob"

Hey there B-Easy! Welcome to Minnesota!

So this team... I just think we're on the right path here. B-Easy is the best talent the Wolves have had since KG was traded. I would say Al Jeff was up there, but he is broken now. And he likes playing defense as much as I like getting jobs. That is to say NOT AT ALL. But let's just put on the goggles for a minute: next year, if it's Rubio, B-Easy, Brewer, Milicic, Wes Johnson, not to mention whatever we can get in a deadline deal (Josh Smith) and all that extra money to get a free agent.... hell man, that's becoming a respectable team. I'm not saying great. But it's getting there. If we can turn a few draft picks into solid pieces, and our coach turns out to be smart (which we haven't had since... oh god, Flip? In 2004? AIIIIIIIIIIIIII), we could be building a foundation. One thing that the Deadzo era made us is patient. As long as we see something, some progress towards something, we can wait. Because with Deadzo, every single year felt like a step back. Except that one year. That was fun.


"That's why I'm sick of getting treated like a motherfuckin step-child"

Oh Cleveland. First LeBron, then Harvey Pekar? "Hey lady, I'm just a kid from the neighborhood!"

1 comment:

Dickfer said...

Another payback with a twist. What is the outcome? Will they do me like Malcolm? Khan! knows he has time. No expectations. It is not like he is rebuilding from a championship. Nope. He just has to raise the bar off the ground. So close to the ground no air gets under it. Slow and steady wins the race.