Wow

So, no Iverson, and the Wolves come out like THAT?

I just see a box score, and it's a horseshit box score.

Another Possibility

To continue with my AI speculation and idea suggestions, here's another one.

Teams involved: Toronto, Philadelphia, Minnesota

The Deal: Minnsota gets Iverson and Ivan McFarlin. Philly gets Foye, Mike James, Morris Peterson, and Pape Sow. Toronto gets Ricky Davis.

The Raptors are said to be looking for a proven scorer at either the SG or SF spot, and Ricky Davis can score - 20ppg with Minnesota last year. Philly gets a couple expiring contracts, a star in the making, and a point guard who can atleast play in a bad system. James is the shortest and least painful of the contracts the Wolves have to get rid of and probably the most likely of those contracts that Philly would cave on. I don't really know why Toronto has fallen out of love with Mo Pete or if they're less in love with Ricky Davis, but it's a possibility.

To Continue My Rant...

I know, I said I was done, but that was only after three quarters. Again in the fourth, like the start of the third, Casey watched James and Davis continually screw up and did nothing to change the team on the floor. Foye had just finished up a fairly long stint in the game - and played fairly well - so he wasn't really an option when James was struggling. But where was Hudson? I never thought I'd say this - and this marks the second time this season I've said it - but I was begging for Troy to be on the floor instead of James. His defense was horrid and he did nothing but stagnate the offense. There needed to be a change in the game for the Wolves and Casey didn't do anything.

However...

James isn't soley responsible for how badly he played because the Spurs defense really keyed in on him and made it difficult to do much with the guys they had on the floor. His shot wasn't falling, he had a tough defensive assignment, and he looked utterly confused when it came to running the teams offense. If I were the coach and was watching my point guard having a tough time, I may not have pulled him, but I would've made a substitution to change his role on the floor - like bring in Troy Hudson at the point and move James off the ball. Turn him into a catch and shooter, an outside threat, and run your offense though KG in the post. Change something so that the Spurs have to adjust to what you're doing instead of beating your head against a sharp, brick wall. Or - hey - try bringing in some guys who can run the floor, bang around on the boards, and general give you a fresh spark of energy. Say, maybe, Justin Reed? Anything to make the Spurs shift out of what they're very clearly comfortable defending.

Now, I'm obviously very upset with the lack of good, consistant basketball that Casey claims his team is playing - they're not - but there were some good things in the game last night.

Defense - When this team is playing well on defense, they're very hard to score on. They seem to communicate well and are helping eachother out. Marko and Hassell are tough on the perimiter and Blount has proved he can actually play a little D when he's in the mood. Ricky comes in flashes and Randy Foye, while showing he's still a rookie, has been fairly dependable on the defensive end of the the floor

Mark Blount - When we traded for Blount I was excited because we got rid of Kandi and got a guy who atleast looked like he tried sometimes. Then, as I watched his game over the last half of last season, I realized he was soft and really liked to shoot too much. He was getting beaten to rebounds by the likes of Earl Boykins, Spudd Webb, and Mugsy Bogues. This year however, he's looking like he really cares about rebounding and defense. I heard some stat while watching the game that over the past 5 games he and KG are combining for 4 blocks a game, with KG at 2.2 and Mark at 1.8. That's a huge help to the perimiter guys defensively. He also had 19 points, 8 rebounds, and 2 steals last night. Watching him play yesterday, I've decided that, while I'd rather have a big banger, I'm comfortable with Blount as our starting center.

Craig Smith - It seems that every time I watch a Wolves game, I'm more and more impressed with this kids game. Yes, he's young and he's made a few mistakes, but when it comes to hustle and smarts, there's no question he's one of the better in those categories on the team. That and he's built like a brick wall. Whether it was Hoiberg or Chapman that clued McHale onto this kid, it's nice to see that the team can atleast get something out of a second round draft pick.

I'm So Mad, This Can't Wait...

Dwayne Casey needs to go. He just isn't a good coach. He cannot make any kind of adjustments or manage a basketball game at all. To start the third quater, Mike James was 0-3, 3 turnovers, 1 foul, and doing his best Sam Cassell-Bull fighter defense. And he's still in the game. Ricky Davis? 0-3, a turnover, and three bad passes. Still in the game. 8 points later, he calls a timeout and his team's once 9-point lead is 1. THEN he calls a timeout. Oh, but he pulled James OR Davis right? Nope. They're still in there fucking it up. Notice how, in the second quarter Popp made some adjustments and ended the quarter on a 10-2 run? Yeah, that's what GOOD coaches do: make adjustments. Casey can't. In his time here, he's never made a good one, or called a timeout when he should have, or pulled a guy out before he killed ALL of his confidence sucking it up.

He, Mike James, and Ricky Davis need to NOT be in Wolves uniforms. Then I might have some faith in this team, but they are just plain bad at basketball.


Rant, ended.

ESPN's Trade Machine and Allen Iverson

There are few things that can eat up hours of my time like the trade machine on ESPN. I spend about half the time dreaming up completely rediculous trades that would never take place, even under the most amazing circumstances. I spend time dreaming up deals that would bring another superstar to Minnesota to play alongside KG, even if it doesn't make much sense for the other team. Of course then a deal comes around that makes me really take a good look at what could be done - in the "real world" - to obtain an available player. In this case it's Allen Iverson. Now, I realize that Jim Gray's words can no longer be trusted, but I don't believe for a minute that our owner's can either. I doubt that the guys running our organization have the brains or the balls to get a deal done to bring THE Answer to Minneapolis, but that doesn't stop me from hoping that a deal could be done - hey, blind squirrel's gotta find a nut sometime, right?

So here are a couple deals that may - or may not - be too complicated for teams to complete, but that might make sense.

Deal #1

Teams involved: Minnesota, Philadelphia, Houston

Philly wants to be rid of Iverson, we all know that.

Houston has its own coach-player drama rearing its head. Bonzi Wells and Jeff VanGundy have not kept their inability to get along a secret. Now, I know they're giving it "one more shot" but I think that's just a professional courtesy on both their parts. So, assuming that doesn't hold, the Rockets may be looking to get rid of Bonzi as well (pun intended. I'll understand if you stop reading now).

Minnesota has so many bad contracts, only the Knicks keep them from looking like the dumbest organization in the league. That said, there are a couple they could dump to grab some more start power at the very least.

The deal:

Allen Iverson goes to Minnesota. Randy Foye, Ricky Davis, Bonzi Wells, and Rafer Alston to Philly. Houston gets Mike James

Why it make sense:

Philly gets two contracts that are up in the next two years(Wells, Davis), plus a Philly familiar, soon-to-be-star(Foye). Not to mention the salary dump over the nex two seasons by losing Iverson.

Houston gets rid of a team-chemistry problem(Wells) and nabs the point guard they were after this past offseason(James) for less than they offered.

The Wolves get rid of two bad contracts(Davis, James) and grab a future Hall of Famer to play next to KG.

The Catch:

Who really wants Rafer Alston?

Deal #2

Teams Involved: Minnesota, Philadelphia, Detroit

Philly we understand: Rid themselves of Iverson

Detroit, while playing well, has some issues on their bench. They're a capable bunch, that's for sure, but they don't exactly have a ton of fire power offensively. Their backup point guard situation isn't much better, not to mention the pending free-agency of Chauncey Billups. They could use some help in both areas.

Minnesota wants AI.

The Deal:

AI to Minny, Foye, Davis, Antonio McDyess go to Philly, Mike James to Detroit.

Why it makes sense:

The Sixers, like in the previous deal, get young talent and a couple contracts that go away in the next two years.

Detroit solves a bench scoring issue with James who could spell both Rip and Chauncey. It may also provide some point guard security in the event that Billups gets too much money in free agency - only a short year away.

The Wolves, get what they did in the first deal: Iverson and rid of two contracts.

The Catch:

Detroit, while interested in Mike James, may not want to mess with the chemistry they have right now - specifically putting any doubt in the fact that Chauncey is their point guard.

Obviously I'm no GM and I'm favoring the Wolves a bit, but I think both those deals would make sense for all teams involved. Of course that's like saying Kevin McHale will try to put a winning product on the floor - which we all know is true. He does try, he's just not very good at it.

Wolves 92 Kings 83

Good game. Nice to be back at it. I'm glad the expectations aren't very high - for me atleast - because it makes watching this team a lot more fun. They played well in stretches and poorly in stretched - mostly when Mike James was on the floor, but I'll get to that in a minute. Defensively they looked very good and on offense you can still see it's a work in progress. I liked what I saw out of our boys last night and I hope they can play like that every night, even if it doesn't always result in a win. They'll be competitive if they do.

The Good
Troy Hudson - I was sort of shocked when he got into the game, like I had forgotten that he could even play. He looked a lot like the T-Hud that earned the contract that we're currently paying him. The offense flowed very well when he was in the game and, even though he forced some shots, he played under control.

KG and Hassell - They were quietly dominant. KG did his thing and Hassell was knocking down open jumpers all night.

Marko the SF - This is what I'm excited about the most after watching the game. I've always liked his game, his size, length, and quickness on defense. But he's not a PG. He was disruptive on defense and he helped get the ball up and down the court on offense. If he does what he did last night all season, he could be a candidate for most improved player.

Craig Smith - The kid takes up a TON of space on the floor. He's smart and he plays very hard, sometimes to his detriment - he fouled out. He's a much more skilled version of Mad Dog who, if he matures, could be a very productive player for the Wovles this season.

The Bad
Mike James - I'm going to cut him some slack because he's in a new system with new coaches and new players, but he looked lost last night. The offense was stagnant when he was in, and I'd be willing to bet 2/3 of their turnovers came while he was in the game. It really says something when you feel more comfortable with Troy Hudson in the game. I'm hoping he can pick it up quickly and contribute the way the Wolves envisioned he could when they signed him.

Mark Blount - He hasn't attained Kandi status yet because he atleast looks like he's playing hard, but he was terrible last night. Some of that was Casey's decision to let him shoot so much early, but he was consistanly being beaten to the glass by opposing guards and employing his standard bullfighter defense "OLE!"

The Funny
Mo Taylor - His sad little effort to goad KG into getting another technical showed me exactly why he's been such a failure in the NBA. That and I think he may have wet his pants after seeing Kevin glaring at him.

Kevin being Kevin - As he's leaving the court after his post game interview, he says to Lea B Thompson, "you look good girl."

THE WOLVES JUST SIGNED...

I...

I can't.

I can't say anything. I can't do anything. This really happened. They really signed this guy. Really. No, really.

Do’s And Don’ts: A Wolves Season Preview

As the baseball playoff pictures shore up – Go Twins! – and the NFL season kicks off, the kids in the NBA begin to gather in preparation for the upcoming NBA season. This is an exciting time for every fan of every team. Dreams of vast improvement or repeating last years’ success dominate fan thought patterns. Everything is very positive for every team right now. Free agents and rookies reporting to camp, the vets coming back feeling refreshed and ready to battle for the next eight months. Expectations are riding high right now and it’s hard to keep them calm since we’ve been without the NBA for 3 months. I try my best to keep myself realistic, often edging more towards skepticism so as not to be disappointed when the Wolves don’t do what I expect them to do. So, here are some things I do and don’t expect to happen this season for my boys.

I do expect the Wolves to play better basketball.
They’ve gotten an infusion of new blood, have been improved in some areas, and will have a refreshed KG ready for another season

I don’t expect that play to be reflected much in their record.
Mike James and Randy Foye, while good players, will not be the save-all fix-all for this team this season. They need capable banger and someone who can help KG on the boards.

I do believe they’ll be in the hunt for a playoff spot deep into the season.
Much like last season, the West will be strong at the top, but tight through the middle and bottom. There’s a chance they could even be in the race into the last month of the season

I don’t believe they’ll make the playoffs.
They’re just not good enough. They don’t have anyone, besides KG, to play defense or rebound. They don’t have a lights-out shooter to keep defenses honest, and they don’t have a point guard that can run an offense effectively. They’ll be close, but they’re not there yet.

I do think Randy Foye will be a top contender for Rookie of the Year.
The kid has everything you want in a young guard: he can get to the basket, shoots the ball fairly well from the mid-range, plays with heart, and has very good character. He showed some flashes of brilliance in the summer league, earning MVP in the Vegas League.

I don’t believe he’ll win it.
He’ll put up strong numbers, he’ll contribute almost from the beginning, but in the end, the Wolves won’t be as improved as Portland, giving a lot of votes to Brandon Roy.

I do expect KG to come back strong this season.
He always does. He never enters a season without fire. KG always comes in enthusiastic, from the first day of camp. Last year is forgotten. For now.

I don’t expect him to be happy when the Wolves don’t achieve success.
When – I hope if, but – the Wolves start sliding, KG will get upset and will fade into that grimacing player he ended last season on. He’ll probably end up calling management out and making some suggestions

I don’t expect him to demand a trade or be traded.
He’s a class act and loyalty is one of his strengths. He may get frustrated, but in the end, he’ll be a Timberwolf at the end of this season

I do expect there will be changes made.
The Wolves have some excess baggage they could really get rid of, but I don’t know how much they’ll be able to dump. The continued lack of success will force McHale’s hand because if he continues to let it happen, the media won’t wait very long to lunge at his throat.

I don’t expect them to be as extensive as last season.
Part of the reason last year was such a debacle was because there was so much change that Casey didn’t know what his lineup would be day-to-day. Unless something comes by that the Wolves cannot turn down, expect the core players to be there all year

I do expect Dwayne Casey to be the head coach all season.
He’s young and he had a tough year last season but, as I said above, his lineup had no consistency due to the front office’s mangle-job. I think Glen will be a bit gun shy, firing two head coaches in three years.

I don’t expect him to avoid some heat.
He’s still young and he’s only in his second year in the first chair, so there will be some slack given, but not as much as last year. There won’t be the roster moves this year, so his effort will stand out more, for better or worse. Like I said, I don’t think their record will reflect the improvement, which means KG will not be happy. As people see KG getting unhappy, they too will get unhappy. The media in Minneapolis is nothing but negative, so they’ll be the first on the ‘Fire Casey’ bandwagon.

I expect almost nothing out of this team, as you may have realized. I hope Mike James is better than I think he is and I hope Randy Foye is half as good as I think he is. It’s still baseball season so I don’t need to talk myself off the ledge yet, but November isn’t that far away.

Here’s hoping this year is better than I expect it to be.

In the meantime, go Twins!

Hey, Did You Guys Hear...

The U.S. lost to Greece? Yeah, they lost, and the media still can't let it go. I mean, they lost. Hey radio jockeys, let it go already, Greece was exactly the team that could beat us and they did. Who cares!

For now...

Let My Bucket Swerrrrrrrrrrve, I'm Takin Off From The Curb

Say what you will about Steph, and lord knows my counterpart has said plenty (mostly things like "I heard he sits down to go pee!" and "He cried when he lost at Golden Tee!"), but this is pretty awesome.

The sneaker industry is like the diamond cartel DeBeers. There is no supply issue. There is no labor issue. The demand is simply CREATED. Nobody on earth needs sneakers. It's a unique marketplace in which the manufacturers drive up demand - through channels such as athletes and advertising - and then they basically challenge consumers. "How much are you willing to pay for these?" The answer is a lot. And it goes up every year. Stop and consider it: yes, Nike makes decent shoes. Most of the Nikes I've owned have been high quality kicks, most have not failed me in years of use. But do you honestly think there is 120 dollars worth of craftsmanship in those sneakers? No, they cost a few dollars to make and a few more dollars to ship. The cost is strictly a who-will-blink-first game of big dollars. And kids keep buying these shoes, because of the image and because they see their favorite stars rocking them on the court.

That brings it to Steph. Adidas could sell the KGs for 20 bucks. Nike could have sold the Jordans for 20 bucks. And they STILL WOULD HAVE MADE A PROFIT. But no, they had to be greedy, had to push the pricepoint, and kids shot each other for those fucking things. The point is that it's a good thing, endorsing these sneakers, and I hope that it catches on as a trend.

It won't. But I can hope, right? Just like I can hope that Buckets has a breakout year and that Marko learns how to pass sometime soon.

This Is Gangsta Shit, It's All I Know, So When I Show Up, Open The Safe And Hit The Floor

What the hell?

"Former NBA player Lonny Baxter was arrested by uniformed Secret Service agents on Wednesday after shots were fired from a vehicle about two blocks from the White House. "

and

"Both Baxter, 27, and the vehicle's passenger, 35-year-old Irvin Martin, were charged with carrying a pistol without a license and other firearms charges. It wasn't immediately clear why they were allegedly firing the gun. "

Oh, I know why. Because George Bush does not like....

Jimmy, get him on the list.

The NBA Takes On A New Tazed

I sat down this summer with Kevin McHale and Isaiah Thomas and discussed the state of the NBA and USA basketball and decided that they just weren't exciting enough. Isaiah was still feeling the pain from all the money he lost on the CBA and was on the hunt for the next big money maker, and McHale was just looking for somewhere else to try his hand at failing. We decided to we wanted to put together an exhibition team to tour around the world, playing similar teams in parts of the world where basketball may not have reached yet. Well, as mentioned above, with USA Basketball in full swing, we were limited in the talent we could take with us, plus, we were having a hard time deciding how to select our team. Isaiah seemed to only want to take selfish, overpaid players, who never quite reached their potential, so they can "earn their f'ing paychecks." McHale on the otherhand could only say one name: Joe Smith. I tried to suggest some other players and ideas, but both were pretty stubborn - I actually had to slap McHale so he would shut up. By this point Isaiah is screaming obsenities in an attempt to convince us that Marbury and Francis could indeed play together. I excused myself to go to the bathroom and left them to senslessly babble at each other. As I was sitting on my throne, reading the daily paper, I came across a story and had a brilliant idea run through my head. I hurridly finished, wiping of course, and ran back to the table where Zeke and McHale were still repeating themselves at each other.

"Guys, I've got it!"

They both turned, and started repeating themselves at me. I slapped McHale and told Isaiah Anucha was behind him and he shut right up. "Guys, check this out. I think I know how to make you both happy - well, you Isaiah, Joe Smith won't figure in yet Kev." He almost started crying until I mentioned Kandi - no Kevin, not the food, the player! "Well guys, we all know that toughness is a huge part of being a good player, right? Okay, well what signifies toughness more than being able to take a taser?" They loved it! It solved all of our problems, heck it even allows the team to chose itself!

So, starting this summer we'll be waiting to see who will select themselves for the first ever All-Tased Team, made up of NBA players! So far we've got committments from Michael Olowokandi and, most recently, Dale Davis. We're holding interviews for head coaches, with Gloria James being the front runner right now. We're keeping our hopes up that Jerry Tarkanian or John Cheney may make themselves available as well, but we'll have to wait and see.

Here's our most likely candidates thus far!


Michael Olowokandi, C - right now he's penciled into the starting lineup after he "forgot his sweatshirt" in the club


Dale Davis, F - he's also penciled into start unless Rasheed Wallace gets ghetto this offseason, or next.


Eddie Griffin, F - He's really just a matter of time. We've been talking to him and, with all the porn watching/jerking off/car crashing, we're just waiting for him to sign the contract


Isiah Rider, G - He might be a long shot due to "previous commitments" but we're hoping he can make parole in time - that's based on the good assumption that he'll be in jail. Here's hoping he resists arrest enough to get tased!


Darrell Armstrong, G - He almost made our squad at the first tryouts but fell just short. We're confident he'll have a better showing next time around.

I also received an email from Gib H. in Green Bay, asking what would happen if there weren't enough NBA players available to complete the team. In that case we're going to look into some other sports - namely the NFL or college football - to see if maybe we can fill out the team. Of course we don't see this as being a problem because we're on a 2-player-per-season pace right now, so we figure we'll have the team put together by 2011, just in time to help warm up the world for the 2012 Olympics!

We're happy to be presenting this idea to you all and, with some luck, we'll be seeing you across the globe!!

Junior Reed Is Back...

The Wolves signed the 6-8 forward to a multi year deal, details undisclosed, but it means he'll be gettin' ghetto in blue again this season. I know it's hard to believe that he gets ghetto - just look at that smile, he's so happy - but he does, and he does it Wu Tang style. He'll sneak up behind you, stick the shiv in, then alley-oop dunk on your head. Or he'll slice your achilles, jump over you, and slap your lay-up attempt into the fourth row. That's the thing about Little Junior Reed; He doesn't give a fuck about jail. Not one. I mean, would you want to spend any time in a cell with him? Fuck that, I know I wouldn't

He was a great hustle and energy guy for us last year, and he is a hell of an athelete. He was decent defensively, and he showed improvement on the offensive side. Hopefully he can come in and back up the 3 and 4 with some quality minutes.

It's so far away, but I still can't let it rest. I need this team, like I need a bag of China White

Why Broken Rappers Suck At Basketball

This summer it has been reported that Troy Hudson refused to workout infront of Timberwolves officials because he apparently doesn't trust them. He feels he's been rushed in the past. Really Troy? I think your agent put it best.

"When he goes to work for them, they push him to do more than he feels he's ready to do"

Hmm, so you don't want to workout because you're still broken and can't run or cut? You don't want us to know that? Hmm.

"I don't think Troy's unhappy being a Timberwolf; he just wants to be healthy and not pushed to do things he doesn't want to do"

Well frankly, there's a ton of shit I don't want to do, but I have to. Just because you're touring with your rap posse, doesn't mean you can skip out on workouts. Just because you don't want to? Troy, that's why you're still broken. That's why you haven't played basketball in two years - well, three if you only count the 2002 playoffs as playing.

Troy, you're broken, worn out, busted up goods, that should be retired and sent away. I know you don't feel like you're done, but you are.

Face the music Troy, you should just shut 'em down.

You Tell Me

You Lie, You Deny, Pass Me The Microphone, I Guess Like Eddie Murphy, You Was Givin Him A Ride Home

Banks out, James in, Eddie needs to spend some time in jail, and KG's in fucking India.

This could be a rough season.

I don't really know what to expect going into October. Mike James is solid, and I don't just say that based on one season in Toronto, because to judge NBA players on their time in Toronto is like judging Dr. Dre on the World Class Wreckin Cru. It just doesn't play in theaters nationwide. But I think he'll be good, certainly provide more leadership and stability than any of the clowns since 2004. He's been pretty consistent in his career, and shoots pretty hot from outside, which you've got to like.

Marko remains like a stone around the Wolves' neck. Every other player on the roster has an "out". Even Blunt, hell, just start him and give him touches, he'll be fine. Ricky could be traded at anytime, for anybody. There are no rules when you look like he does. Hudson... just bench him, forever. Don't let him play ever again. It's fine. He doesn't need to ever walk again. He's a scumbag and always has been.

But Marko... what do you do with this guy? Well, you PUT HIM AT 2 AND GET HIM THINKING LIKE A BASKETBALL PLAYER AGAIN. It's simple. Marko's problems are twofold:

1) His eyes are too close together
2) He plays point guard like I end a night after drinking heavily; that is to say, he pisses his pants

There is no cure for #1. But #2 has a solution built in. Marko has the physical tools to be a decent basketball player, dammit all, I'm serious! But not where he is right now. He's too stupid and scared to play against Americans at the point. He gets burned by Tony Parker 3 times, and he starts to cry (which looks funny, because of the narrowly-spaced eyes). But enough jokes. Get this kid some confidence, and he can be a soldier. He can't play scared.

By losing Banks, I think the Wolves are done making moves for this coming season. I just don't see a lot of trade activity that the Wolves will be a part of. They don't have enough pieces to go after a superstar, and they aren't so bloated they need to dump salary. And this season could be huge, because I feel really bad about KG, worse than I've ever felt. He's blogging in Asia right now, and there is a glaring deficiency of Wolves-related posts. I understand... he's on the other side of the earth, he should be talking about different cultures and his experiences and all, but it's obvious that he just doesn't have much interest in discussing his professional team. And that's ok, but you can tell he's stewing about something, I mean, these moves can't make him happy.

But Randy Foye, man, that guy is so ghetto I heard his momma stabbed his girlfriend's phone up cause she was late with the Burger King. So, it might be all good.

Who Doesn't Love KG Commercials?

You'll notice a couple other Wolves in this add too! Get out the box cutter mutha fukka!

KG v TD and the world

Remember this? Yeah, that's what I thought. This is one of my favorites!

A Miraid Of Pictures...

Eddie Griffin.


"Griffin also had a problem at Roman Catholic High School in Philadelphia. He was involved in a fight in the lunch room."

Awww, but look at him, he wouldn't fight anyone, would he?



"Griffin was suspended for one game by coach Tommy Amaker for an incident following Saturday's game against Georgetown. Reports indicated Griffin hit teammate Ty Shine in the locker room."

Well, if that's to dude he's hangin' with, I guess fighting in the locker room is just part of his business. Do you see the look in that dudes' eyes? I'm pretty sure someone will get 'dealt with' soon.



"He failed to show up for several practices in 2003 training camp and was suspended. During the suspension, there was gunfire at his home on Oct. 25. He was charged with assault with a deadly weapon. Later, he was ordered to stand trial on a misdemeanor for drug possession."

Hey Eddie, why you poutin'? You still mad you missed your ol' lady?



"The suit alleges that Griffin was drunk and watching a porno movie on a DVD screen while driving and masturbating when he lost control of his vehicle. "

Just imagine the same look, but the eyes are droopy and can't see clear.



"The hair on his head is closely cropped, and the facial hair is still thin enough to question whether or not it could grow other than above his lip and below his chin."

I just can't put enough emphasis on one's ability to grow a mustache. Your life success rate depends soley on that ability, and if you can't grow anything but a thin mustache, you're chances of success are just that: Slim.

Oh, and incase you forgot...

Oh, so we up and steal Mike James?

That's enough to bring me back from the dead, sho nuff.

James is old, but he's consistent. I'd rather have him than Marko and Troy. Yeah, no shit. And I'd rather have 2 chocolate bars than a bird flu sandwich. They trade like dice these days. Anyway, yeah, I'm excited at that. Does that mean no more Banks? Well, if so, I guess that's not so bad. Banks has too much potential and raw energy, and not enough skills like "holding on to the basketball" and "passing to teammates instead of opponents". I'm not knocking though. It's all good. I'm just surprised James wants to play with the Wolves. I mean, come on. We're not exactly asking our bosses if it would be ok if we took a few weeks off in June "just in case", now, are we?

Welcome aboard James! Have you met Eddie Griffin? He's got some movies to show you...